Full Disclosure

This is day 42 of my blog so we go back to the beginning.

Our first date was on the second Wednesday in November 1987. An intimate one on one between two lonely people. The initial meeting was kinetic so this first date was like being with someone I had known all of my life. There were no awkward moments or silences, just common conversation and lots of laughter. He would talk and I listened, then I would talk and he listened. We shared mutual ideas and stories and it was on this very first night that he told me the story of why he was alone. Oh there were the children, but no significant mate, at that time.

He told me that his wife had died and that it had been by his had and his soul was torn wide open. He had served two years in prison from an initial sentence of forty. He said he had asked for Gods grace to be released so that he could take care of his children and God appeared to him in his cell and told him, "Be not afraid, I am with you." Several months later he was released.

Melvin worked and retired from U.S. Steel. Frequently the company would lay off workers for one reason or another. When he was laid off, he kept the boys. At this time the youngest of the three was not yet two. While getting ready to cook he needed help on how to prepare a meal, so he called her office and was told she was on vacation and had been so for two weeks. Not knowing what to feel or what to think, he waited for her to come home so they could talk about it.
Him - "How was work today?"
Her -  "It was alright."
Him - "I called your office, they said this is your second week of vacation."
Her - "Well now you know and I am leaving."
Him - "You can go, but with the clothes you have on, leave my car and you can't have the children."
From there the words became daggers, cutting and maiming the other. The gun was hidden from where she placed it. She is searching frantically, he's hidden it, afraid she'll find it, he scrambles to the kitchen cupboard, she's behind him with the phone, trying to make a call. With the baby in his arms he turns, she hits him upside his forehead with the phone, the blow jars him, first reaction, to swing. He hits her in the back of the head, she's on the floor. He's thinking, shes acting. He calls for her to get up, no response. He's thinking this is going to get worse, I've got to get the kids out of here. He calls his sister, we're fighting, she wants to leave and she can not have my children, I'm bringing them over. While he's taking the boys to their aunt, she calls the police. When he returns, the house is surrounded by people and police. The police ask, "Is this your home." He says, "Yes, where is my wife." "She's dead sir, what happened." He mentally passes out.
He'd hit her with the gun in his hand and it fired, with all the commotion he said he didn't hear the sound.

For some reason hearing the story did not frighten me or make me want to say, "Okay, well it was nice meeting you..." just the opposite I felt closer to him. To this day I don't know if he told me because he wanted to tell me before anyone else or he liked me so much that he wanted to make a full disclosure in order to make or break our bond. All I know is I admired his honesty and from that day on we never hid anything from one another.

I can also say that I love his first wife very much, because she gave me my children and my grandchildren and to deny her or belittle her would be a travesty. My husband spoiled those he loved and sometimes that kind of love can be taken for granted and misused.

But we loved each other enough to stand the rain.

Tomorrow